Raja and James' Story

Raja and James were nervous but felt emotionally ready about the prospect of parenthood, deciding to adopt after years of trying for a child. They had prepared themselves as much as they thought they could have, having gone through the gruelling adoption process. Although Raja and James were supported in ways by social care and specialist adoption teams, the support soon stopped and they struggled to cope. They were disturbed by the feelings their son evoked in them sometimes. They didn’t always know what to make of their son’s behaviour, although it seemed to them to be a communication of how he was feeling. This began to put a huge strain on their relationship and they began to believe they were failing as parents. EMDR helps a person to get to the source of their distress and process it so that it no longer triggers a disturbing feeling. With EMDR Raja and James were each able to work through the impact and meaning that their son’s behaviour was having on them as individuals. They soon felt more in control of their own feelings, so that son’s behaviour did not provoke in them the same anxiety and fear as it once did. This meant they were better able to help their son with his emotions and behaviour and family life improved.